The first time I brought you home to meet my parents, Peter, they wanted to know why I brought home someone who looked like he lived in the Outdoor Gear section of Wal-Mart.
My friends thought it was cute that I was dating a "struggling composer," and that I might do a good deed by getting you a job on a TV show.
My manager did always think you were stupid, and now I kind of have to agree with him because it's spelled "beyotch!"
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Saturday, April 12, 2008
Yeah, right!
Hey! Sorry I haven't written in a while.
Anyway, I hope none of you are believing what Peter Bretter is writing. First of all, I highly doubt he could get all of those girls to sleep with him (let alone one), even if they were drunk. Second of all, if any girl really did sleep with him, look out because he'll be calling you for three weeks straight just to see if you two are "okay."
In college he was too scared to be promiscious because he thought he'd get herpes and die in a week. Peter Bretter is a man-whore wanna be.
Oh, and I hope that girl did steal the $40 from your wallet AND the $65 you keep in the bottom of your sock drawer! Look in the sock drawer imaginary skanks.
Anyway, I hope none of you are believing what Peter Bretter is writing. First of all, I highly doubt he could get all of those girls to sleep with him (let alone one), even if they were drunk. Second of all, if any girl really did sleep with him, look out because he'll be calling you for three weeks straight just to see if you two are "okay."
In college he was too scared to be promiscious because he thought he'd get herpes and die in a week. Peter Bretter is a man-whore wanna be.
Oh, and I hope that girl did steal the $40 from your wallet AND the $65 you keep in the bottom of your sock drawer! Look in the sock drawer imaginary skanks.
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
5 Stages of GRIEF!
Once again Peter Bretter has it all wrong. Aldous Snow is NOT a douche. Although Peter's most recent blog was very hurtful and rude, I think he is almost over me. Anger is stage two of the 5 stages of grieving, so he only has 3 stages to go. His wishes of horrible things to me are typical of a grieving person, so I'm not that upset. There are plenty of things I could embarrass him about and many possible blackmale tactics I could use, but I will be the bigger person and rise above it.
Liz is right, Peter: don't let this new "hatred" for me keep growing, pour some bleach on it and get over it. Wow, that metaphor works here, too.
Liz is right, Peter: don't let this new "hatred" for me keep growing, pour some bleach on it and get over it. Wow, that metaphor works here, too.
Monday, March 31, 2008
First of all I just want to thank the people who are putting up the supportive Sarah Marshall billboards. I think Peter's billboards are childish and stupid. He needs to grow up and get over our relationship; I have. I know some people are going to think that I'm being hard on him, but he is a very stubborn man who needs to let go. And just for the record I did not "suck the life" out of Peter.
Over all, I just need to get my life back on track... the way it was before Peter and his meltdown and all of his billboard drama.
Over all, I just need to get my life back on track... the way it was before Peter and his meltdown and all of his billboard drama.
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